i'm more prone to making conjectures now, which is benign in the sense that a tumor can be benign: it does no harm, but it causes awareness and one wants to take care of it, just in case.
of course it would be better if i could prove my conjectures, because they are hardly the earth-shattering variety. as is the case in academia, these are not very motivating except to a handful of academics.
oh well. work is work. it keeps me from loitering on street corners, for instance. q:
meetings with the advisor have taken on a different turn: not bad, but different. strange to say, but lately it's been worthwhile to mention those ideas which i tried and which failed, due to possible obstruction from examples.
i suppose it keeps the inquiry in a relatively concrete setting .. or as concrete as theoretical mathematics goes. i still don't know where things are headed, but i've been worse and i'm making a little progress now.
progress, however, can be dangerous: one tastes a little success and is hungry for more. if one isn't careful, the hungry excitement turns to frustration and then anger, or desperation and then depression.
i call it "(the law of) conservation of emotional energy."
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