recruitment weekend here in ann arbor is an Event.
prospective grad students come from all over the states to visit our department, because the ball's in their court. they come to have a careful look, in order to decide whether this will be their ph.d. experience after all.
as a prospective i enjoyed that weekend. a friend of mine and i were both accepted and traveled together, which i suppose is partly unfair. the point is to meet new people and fellow "prospies," which R and i did.
then again, i remember:
* playing quite a few games of table tennis,
* sitting in on a first-year algebra class; it was just to know how hardcore these guys were, with their algebra; it wasn't much, but i scared easily then.
* sneaking out to have a beer before the event-sponsored dinner;
* working on a problem set at the corner coffeehouse, while waiting for the airport shuttle. (that was before it became an espresso royale.)
four years ago, i was a first-year and talked about my immediate experiences, which is what a prospy should know. it was strange, though, meeting my successors, and i think i made too much of it. i don't think i was very helpful.
three years ago, i was a second year and told the prospies about a more long-term view of grad school -- that there was life after quals, and that there would be research and the frustrations following research .. but not to worry. things have a way of working out.
two years ago and one year ago, i stopped recalled my memories and talked to the prospies about grad school in general. they looked younger than ever, and someone had to give them advice regardless of where they will go for a ph.d.
since you're going to grad school anyway, watch out for this and that. don't worry about exams and class requirements and whatnot; there will always be something else to "hurry" about and you might as well enjoy yourself and be well-rested.
quals will frustrate you, but you'll get past them; you won't understand now, but one day you will. you will find an advisor, even if you don't know what you want to work on now or a year or two from now. it will work out.
now.
now, i can't remember the subtleties of my experiences anymore. all i remember are the frustrations and the worries, the pleasant yet unnerving surprise that i averted disaster again, somehow ..
i remember this past summer, this past fall, the recent winter.
i remember the advisor: hearing the bad news, seeing him unwell, hoping and believing but working feverishly in spite of my hope ..
i remember october thirtieth,
and i remember early december.
i'm the wrong person to talk to a prospective student.
i don't care if s/he's an analyst, even a metric analyst. heck, it wouldn't matter if s/he told me that s/he loves the geometry of the heisenberg group and currently thinking about geometric measure theory. i'd be impressed and surprised, but nonetheless ..
.. it's hard enough to keep my act together; some days i wonder if i'll really pull it off. i don't think i'm capable of advising others -- kids so young, at that -- of whether they will be successful here in this place, this town, this school, this mathematical community, is right for them.
i'm leaving soon. i'll be nostalgic and reflective, passive. they don't need to hear history. they need facts and current states of affairs. they don't need to hear from me.
besides, i'm visiting colleagues and friends in pittsburgh. happy coincidence: there's a conference and the list of speakers and participants are my people. (:
No comments:
Post a Comment