progress, measured by pages.

maybe i misjudge: it's easier to say that i've been more productive on non-computer mornings and days, because i am a compulsive "jotter" ..

"writer" is not quite the right word, because i feel it should mean someone who composes and edits texts which will eventually be complete and contain deep ideas. i haven't proven myself capable of the word, and that is the truth.

i can say that my daily quota is 3-5 sides of paper (possibly from the recycling bin) full of notes, but this includes smallish diagrams, attempts at proof, recapitulation [1] of yesterday's work (and days before, if i'm still trying to prove the same thing!), and then there is some extra exposition (in order to remember the intuition, and how to proceed).

plus, i'm wordy, which confuses everyone, including me.

but count the pages: over a week, that's at least 15 pages, or even 30! it's very good for self-esteem, i say!


in contrast, if you manage another 1/3 of a page of LaTeX on a computer, it seems to tell you little: it does not count the volume of words which has been cut and pasted and deleted. often only the nonsilly part is what survives the "save" command, and one does not keep much extraneous data.

(so let me tell you: when working things out "by hand," i often write silly things!)

moreover, your computer remains the same size: mass or volume, it doesn't matter the measurement. it is not like a pile of paper notes, over a week, which forms a pile ..neat or messy, it weighs more. though there is no reason to measure progress by physical size, we humans still do it anyway.

i know i do.




[1] let me disspell illusions; i learned this word from the adviser. i may be wordy, but i'm not that eloquent!